This was my new mantra; after everything with Joe and believing that I had let the best thing in my life go before of beliefs that I didn't even believe in, I needed to keep an open mind with what the future could bring. Joe always told me that one of his fears, for me, was that I would not let anyone else into my life. His fear was founded as he knew me well. Even friends had told me over the years that I had never really given any other guy a fair chance. So, pushing that all aside, I was set to keep an open mind about every guy that I met going forward.
Walter and I had a long few weeks over Skype. We were both busy, but still made it work. Despite the time differences, we managed to have online dinner dates almost daily and found ways to make things work. Time was going by so quickly and I was excited about going to see him in Halifax for the long weekend. I found it surprising when he asked me if it was okay if he ran a 10km race while I was there. He had ran it the year before and was excited to have the opportunity to run in it again. I had no issues and it wouldn't have bothered me if he hadn't asked. It was considerate of him, and I appreciated it. He always found a way to make me feel very important and made it a point to let me know that I was a big part of his life now. He had mentioned before I visited that he had even put pictures of me up on his fridge, by his bedside and his office. This was odd for me. Very odd. Our family home barely has pictures of the family around. I've only ever kept one picture of Joe around, and it was because he gave me the frame as a gift. Joe never kept pictures of me (or anyone else) around. It just wasn't something I was brought up with or was used to. But, keeping an open mind, I thought to myself 'well, that's nice of him'.
Walter and I ended up having some pretty serious discussions early on in our relationship. I was going to be finishing up my Masters and needed to decide whether I would be moving back to Toronto or to Halifax (to be with Walter). Walter and I talked about Halifax and whether or not it was the right thing to do; neither of us wanted a long-distance relationship for another year and things were going well. We would see if I could pick up a job in Halifax, and then decide. Accordingly, I had lined up a few interviews for the weekend while I was visiting Walter. I had nothing to lose. Plus, I liked the guy..a lot. :)
I was thrilled to see him in Halifax - I had called a very good friend of mine for fashion advice. I live in my baggy sweats and hoodies - it's incredibly comfortable and usually I don't really care about what people think. But, I was slowly reforming my ways and this was a weekend that mattered to me. I needed advice on the best combinations in my wardrobe to be able to pack in the most minimalistic yet fashionable way possible. Clearly, if I was taking the time to figure out what I wanted to wear, I like this guy... ;)
I have a soft spot for men in uniform - I don't know many women who don't. Army uniforms, especially. Yum. I was expecting to take a cab from the airport to meet up with Walter as he mentioned that he was busy at work and wanted to wrap things up before I arrived. One of his friends (I found out later) had threatened to smack him upside the head if he didn't pick me up, so as I made my way down the stairs to the arrivals area, there was Walter, all handsome-looking in his fabulous army uniform!!
He had scouted out some gluten-free places for me to eat and we grabbed a quick bite before my first interview. I had two lined up that afternoon and one for the morning before I left. The first two schools ended up loving me, but sadly had no openings at the time. The third school also (thankfully) loved me and could likely only offer a part time opening. We would see where things went.
Walter had invited his friends over for a party that evening - he was very excited to introduce me to everyone. It was clear that he spoken a lot about me to his friends. I wasn't sure how I felt about that as we had made a decision to keep things fairly low key until we were sure things would work out. It was a fun night, though. His friends were fantastic and we had a lovely evening.
We went to brunch the next morning with his friends, who were fantastic. Such sweethearts. If these are the types of people he is good friends with, then I don't have much to worry about! :)
Walter ran his 10k race and a friend of his came with me to cheer him on. I had t-shirts made that said "Go Walter, Go!" on them as a fun surprise. He was thrilled and we had a blast walking around in the sun from one point of the race course to the other. Thankfully, we caught Walter as he was about to cross the finish line and to my surprise, he looked like he was ready to pass out! He had been telling me about his rigorous training schedule for the race, but I guess the ups/downs of the actual course took it's toll on him... turned out that he had beat his previous time by 25 seconds, so he was happy! :)
We met up with some other friends of his the next morning for brunch at Cora's. I decided to wear my Lululemons with a nice top, long sweater and ballet flats. It was dressing up the lulu's, which fit well and overall, the outfit worked. I was still new to Lulu (I've always been a hardcore Roots fan) so was sharing my excitement of having a pair of very comfy pants that can be dressed up and down. Walter wasn't thrilled about my excitement because he "would've rather that [I] had worn jeans to brunch". Oh.
Did I hear you right? Did you just say what I think you said? Really? You would rather that I had worn jeans?
I tried to drop the issue. 'Don't start a fight now, Anika, it's not worth it', I kept telling myself. I couldn't help it though - when I get annoyed, I go quiet and he knew something was wrong. After awhile, I finally gathered the courage to confront him on it and explain that I had spent quite a bit of time putting together my wardrobe and that I didn't think it was fair for him to say that he would've preferred if I had worn jeans. My attire was perfectly fine and we were just going to Cora's!
I mostly got over it - he apologized and said that it wasn't what he meant. He just didn't think that Lulu's were as versatile as I was pointing them out to be. Fine. Small issue, move on. Keep an open mind.
As would have been expected, there were some intimate moments during the weekend. It was nice to be held after such a long time and to feel the comfort of being in someone's arms. I discovered, however, that Walter had never manscaped in his life. One of the many Skype conversations we'd had was about relative deal breakers. One of mine, was a hairy bum. Just don't like thinking about. I know, it's common, but there are so many ways to rectify that. Walter had told me that it wasn't an issue and that he was glad that he had inherited the non-hairy genes from his parents. Brilliant! Not the case, however. Keep an open mind. He had lied to me and I felt slightly betrayed. Not that, in reality, I would have ever ended a relationship over something so little (because it can easily be fixed), but lying was not acceptable. So, lies and no manscaping (of any kind). Both gross. (Keep an open mind.) So I explained that I wasn't happy with the lie (he apologized and tried to explain), nor with the manscaping (which upset him). If he can tell me that he prefers that I wear jeans, I sure as heavens can tell him that I prefer some sort of maintenance in the hair department. It was as if he was wearing a rug from the waist down. Gross. He eventually acknowledged and accepted my points, which helped with the theme of keeping an open mind!
As I packed to head back to the UK, we quickly realized that we were running late. I asked him throw the last few things into my bag while I finished getting a few other things ready. One of the items that needed to go in was my computer cable. We were under a time crunch but that didn't seem to bother Walter. Being a military man, he took his time to meticulously wrap the cable before throwing it into the bag. He drove exactly 100km/hr the entire way to the airport and I was incredibly lucky for the lack of traffic and checked in my bags with one minute to spare. Phew! As I boarded the plane after saying goodbye (and knowing that I would see him only three weeks later in the UK), I remember the computer cable and thought "Who does that??". Oh well, Anika, keep an open mind!
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